|Mom and Dad at the entrance to their new place, October 2011.|
Friday, March 9, 2012
I have been visiting Dad every day since Mom’s passing on March 1, 2012. This was one of my promises to my mother but also a part of my commitment to Dad. Overall I would say he is doing well. He has changed some of the wall art in the living room to remind him more of Mom. Their wedding photo is on the table next to his chair with a petal from the rose he placed on Mom’s casket during the cremation committal service. Mom’s clothes have been given to Goodwill and other items have been given to those to whom she designated. Dad is still able to maintain his schedule. Wake, get coffee brewing, walk dog, eat breakfast, walk dog again, etc. He is able to do pretty much everything himself with the exception of the bills. He could do it if instructed but he has not been involved in that end of the household for fifty years and prefers that I take care of it.
Dad and I will take a trip to see his doctor in another two weeks. We will also be checking out a grief counseling group. Dad really surprised me when he said he would go with me, although I’m not sure he will talk much but maybe I will be surprised.
Dad and I talk everyday about feelings, a conversation not many people have had with Dad. Dad keeps his emotions to himself and rarely shows them, unlike his youngest son here, who wears his on his sleeve! Dad is depressed but who would blame him. He says he talks to Mom throughout the day and wishes he could be with her. He is not happy about the idea of living another ten, twenty years without her. Longevity is common on his side of the family, a fact that has not escaped him over the past week.
We will gather with family and friends this Saturday, March 10, 2012 to celebrate Mom’s life. Each of her kids will make a small presentation, Glen, Terri, Kurt, Jayden, Robin and Ryan. We will have prayers and stories to tell, and a memory table or two with items representing all of mom’s accomplishments. Two different videos will be running at the same time with images of Mom and her family throughout her sixty-six years here on earth. We will post a video link to the service on this blog after the service.